I am with you always Matthew 28:20 (NIV)

Why Me vs Me Too

While “why me” might be an expressive, accurate question based on a set of particularly horrendous circumstances, it is hardly ever a helpful question to ask.

Now, look. I’m a HUGE “why me” asker.

– I had to quit coffee this year for three months: WHY ME?
– We live in a tiny, old house: WHY ME?
– I was sick for a few years: WHY ME?
– We quit our jobs and started over again in our thirties: WHY ME (us)?
– Trouble making ends meet: WHY ME?
– My family is a mess: WHY ME?

Why, why, why, why, why?


We all ask it, and that’s fine. It becomes “not fine” when we let the question take up too much room in our hearts and minds – when we don't move on from it. Because the longer we ask it, the more we focus on how “unfair” things and life seem to be for us; the louder our pains and frustrations become; the more overwhelmed we feel. If asked long enough, this question will turn us into the victims of fate. It might make some of us vengeful, some of us achingly depressed, and more of us despondent.

It puts an intense light on our individuality, so much so, that we can’t see anything or anyone else with clarity… like a blinding brightness in the eyes.

Here’s the thing:

You may be going through crap. You might legitimately be able to cry “why me?” and no one would question it. But dear friend, don’t sit too long with this question.

Because when you stop asking it for long enough, you'll be able to hear something else.

“Me too.”

You see, we all have something. And there will always be those who can one-up your “why me.” But it’s not about that either. As long you as you are busy focusing on “why me”, you won’t be able to hear all the “me too’s” reverberating out through the lives of those around you.

You won’t be able to offer your own “me too” to the wondrous chorus, either.

Unfortunately, life isn’t fair. Not for anyone. No matter what Twitter, the papers or the media say.

“Fair” is a distraction from something far more important: presence.

Matthew recorded Jesus last words on earth as being:

“And remember, I am with you always, to the end of the age.” (Matt 28:20 NIV).

We think, “Awesome! God is with us. ON our side. Beside us. He’s geographically close.”

But what if Jesus also meant: “I am WITH you. I know what it is to be human. I know what is to laugh and cry. I am your present to your joy and suffering, the mediocre and the mundane, the bliss and the pain – I am in it with you; I feel it with you.” What if it’s an internal “me too” that Christ says with his hands and feet and heart and grace?

“Why me?” has never brought anyone together. And togetherness, my friends, is the point. That’s what “me too” does so beautifully.

'Why me?' has never brought anyone together. And togetherness, my friends, is the point. Click to Tweet

Written by Liz Milani

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