They all ate and were satisfied, and the disciples picked up twelve basketfuls of broken pieces that were left over. Matthew 14:20 (NIV)
The Mess and The Meal – The Table Series – Part 5
Go to PART 1 | PART 2 | PART 3 | PART 4 | PART 5 | PART 6 | PART 7
Jesus fed five thousand people with two pieces of fish and five loaves of bread. The story goes that after everyone was finished, there were twelves basketfuls of leftovers.
In response to these “leftovers,” I’ve heard people say, “God doesn’t just provide what we need, but more than enough; above and beyond.”
But when God has ‘provided for me,’ there hasn’t been any leftovers. There’s always been just enough. (And dare I say, it often feels like not quite enough). When money has turned up, it’s been just what I needed. When a friend has called on a bad day, it’s been just what I needed. When I’ve fallen short on a project or in a relationship, the grace I’ve received has been just what I needed. My seat at the table has always been just what I needed. I always come back hungry again in a few hours time.
I’ve heard some suggest that the twelve baskets of leftover food could have been given to the poor. But that doesn’t sit well with me. I long for the day when the poor get given our “firsts” not our “seconds”. Every time we see Jesus extend compassion, it’s never been a case of “leftovers.”
When I’ve been poor in spirit, he’s never given me his seconds.
I think what the story is trying to tell us is this: After everyone had eaten and were satisfied, they cleaned up.
Tables aren't always neat and tidy, meals and time together always create mess – sometimes a beautiful mess, other times, not so much.
Nearly a year ago, I was out to dinner with some friends. We got to talking about a certain situation, and I found myself spewing out words of such bitterness and heartache I didn’t even realize was still buried deep inside me. The mess I had to clean UP after that meal was more than pots and pans and leftovers.
When talking about writing, Anne Lamott said:
“Perfection is a mean, frozen form of idealism, while messes are the artist’s true friend. What people somehow (inadvertently, I’m sure) forgot to mention when we were children was that we need to make messes in order to find out who we are and why we are here.” (Bird by Bird, by Anne Lamott.)
I think the same can be said of meals and tables and sharing life. It’s messy. Bringing people together is no easy task. We don’t all believe the same, look the same, worship the same. We have prejudices and preferences, some of us rich, others poor. Some of us are in need, some of has have an abundance. Most of us a crazy mix up of it all. Life is messy; there is no working around that. And when we seek to build bridges and tear down walls, well, that work creates mess, too.
Matthew (and Mark and Luke and John) mentions the leftovers because he saw Jesus model the value of finishing what he started; of cleaning up, of taking the time to address the mess and attend to it tenderly, carefully and thoroughly. He didn’t ignore it.
The twelve baskets of broken up pieces of bread and slimy half eaten fish tell us that life happened in that place, that day in the middle of nowhere, and a clean up ensued. The life that transpired was valued not just in the moment of the meal but in the process of attending to the mess that everyday life always leaves behind.
After the meal is done, and life has been shared, attend to the leftovers and mess. Make peace; forgive or ask for forgiveness; think things over; remember the love and bind it to your heart; mull over the conflict and let it question your integrity and vulnerability; collect the wisdom that has dropped to the floor in the form of crumbs and scraps in the baskets that you keep in your heart; clean up. It’s just as much a part of the meal as the feast itself.
And in just a few hours time, the table will need to be set again.
Go to Part 6 – A Convenient Miracle »
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