Love does not traffic in shame and disrespect, nor selfishly seek its own honor. 1 Corinthians 13:5 (TPT)
Shame Is – Love Series – Part 4
Go to PART 1 | PART 2 | PART 3 | PART 4 | PART 5 | PART 6 | PART 7
“Trafficking” is moving something from one place to another. Love does traffic things indeed, moves them around, takes them from place to place. But it does not, and never will, traffic shame, disrespect or act conceited. That is not the way of love.
On Super Soul Sunday a while back, Dr. Brené Brown said:
“Shame is the most human primitive emotion that we all experience. It is the intensely painful feeling that we are unworthy of love and belonging. I think Shame is lethal. I think that shame is deadly. And I think we are swimming in it deep… Shame needs three things to grow exponentially in our lives: Secrecy, silence, and judgment. [But] shame cannot survive being spoken, it cannot survive empathy… Shame depends on me buying into the belief that I am alone.”
(here’s the link: http://www.supersoul.tv/supersoul-sunday/dr-brene-brown-shame-is-lethal)
We are swimming deep in it. Shame keeps us bound, hiding, alone, pretending, and fighting. It drives us to seek out our own honor, selling us a lie that that's how we find freedom.
Bring it to the light. Talk about it. Drown it in empathy. Say to someone's shame “Me too,” and the shame will begin to dissipate. It takes courage, it takes vulnerability. And I think we can do it!
I think that's what the scripture, “Love covers a multitude of sins” is talking about. (1 Peter 4:8 and Prov 10:12). It's not that love covers up our sins and shames, hiding them away, under a blanket so they can’t be seen. Love obliterates the shame that’s attached to our hearts and lives through empathy and solidarity, freeing us (sometimes instantly, sometimes day-by-day) from the trap that secrecy, silence, and judgment keeps us in.
I believe that's why the sacred text we call the Bible is full of stories of the mistakes, sins, pains and tragedies of its characters. It doesn’t hide away the wrestling of our faith ancestors; it reveals them, and in turn removes our shame so that we can move into transformation and wholeness.
Love traffics empathy and vulnerability, grace and freedom. It travels these things from person to person through us. Through our spoken-out-loud, real-life, everyday stories of courage and hope.
More tomorrow…
Dr. Brené Brown’s work has changed my life. Check out “The Power of Vulnerability.”
Over to you… how does shame affect you? Leave us your comments below or email us at talktous@pktfuel.com
Go to Part 5 – Irritated and Frustrated »
[vcex_image_grid columns=”3″ pagination=”false” thumbnail_link=”custom_link” link_title_tag=”true” custom_links_target=”_blank” overlay_style=”title-category-visible” columns_gap=”5″ img_hover_style=”fade-out” image_ids=”20934,20935,20937″ custom_links=”https://itunes.apple.com/app/apple-store/id1239768002?pt=118656308&ct=blog%20footer&mt=8,https://www.pktfuel.com/dailyemail,https://www.pktfuel.com/support” img_height=”350″]