I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Psalm 139:14 (NIV)
ORIGINAL
I used to think that I had to be totally original, out of the box. No one was allowed to be the same as me. If my brothers mixed their chocolate sprinkles with their ice cream after I did, I’d lose it. If my friend bought the same top as me, I’d feel ripped off. If someone preached on a topic that I wanted to speak on before I got a chance to, I felt like I’d lost the race.
Because originality is what sets you apart, right? It's what will make me noticed above the rest? Picked and chosen and deemed awesome? Like Coco Channel said: “To be irreplaceable, one must always be different.”
And no one wants to be replaceable.
And yet, while I was striving to be original, I was deeply comparative. Constantly comparing myself to skinnier women, eloquent men, hard-working mums, charitable young adults. I tuned my life in to the brief of “modern-cool-pastor-leader-woman,” and much of that tune up was at the expense of my actual originality (we’ll get to that in a minute).
There's much dissonance between the ache to standout, and wanting to fit in. It clashes in our hearts and minds perhaps more than we know.
Those two races – originality and popularity – cannot be run side by side, and are not nourishing to the those that run them. They will burn you out and suck you dry, whether you're chasing one or the other, or both at the same time. And at the end? You won’t find the prize you’re looking for. Unfortunately, many of us are caught up in these tracks, trying to fit in and belong while standing out and being different.
The Bible delivers whiplash on this too:
“There is nothing new under the sun.” (Ecc 1:9).
“I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” (Ps 139:14).
Or does it?
In recent years, I’ve cared less and less about both being different and fitting in. I’ve realized that Coco Channel's idea is just that: an idea. A hugely flawed one.
There is nothing new under the sun, yet we are all so different and unique and beautiful. Somehow it all works hand in hand. The more I don’t care about fitting in, and I instead focus on loving the people around me and loving who I am at this moment, the more I feel like I belong. The less I care about being different and first and a standout, the more I’m finding my own unique voice and craft, and it makes me so glad to share it with whoever (WHOEVER) comes by it.
Don’t be someone else's version of original, don’t be pop cultures, or the new show, or your current read, or Instagram worthy’s version of original.
Be your original, glorious self. We exist in an ancient world that has seen and done it all, and yet, has more to discover. And the race to find that more?
It is not a race, it’s a practice: Be you.
Written by Liz Milani
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