Doubts are the ants in the pants of faith. They keep it awake and moving. – Frederick Buechner.
Doubt and Faith – The Believe Series – Part 2
Go to PART 1 | PART 2 | PART 3 | PART 4 | PART 5 | PART 6 | PART 7
Growing up, I believed that doubt and faith were opposites. If I doubted, it meant that I didn’t have faith.
The problem is, I have doubts. AND, I still have faith.
World Peace? Doubts.
Uncorrupt governments? Doubts.
Free from the impact of natural disasters? Doubts.
Will slavery end? Doubts.
That we will take care of the vulnerable and weak rather than exploit them? Doubts.
That I can forgive? Doubts.
That I can love the unlovable? Doubts.
That I can have empathy for my enemy? Doubts.
Chocolate won’t make me fat? Doubts.
That I can learn to love myself? Doubts.
Grace? Doubts.
I could go on.
One thing I’ve learned about my doubts is that they don’t necessarily take me away from faith, often they drive me further into it. I don’t think faith can exist outside of the presence of doubt. Faith that lives on its own, apart from doubt and questions, is certainty (aka, not faith). Why do we call a particular kind of jump a leap of faith? Because there is a chance that we will fall, a chance that we won’t make it.
Frederick Buechner wrote: “Whether your faith is that there is a God or that there is not a God, if you don’t have any doubts you are either kidding yourself or asleep. Doubts are the ants in the pants of faith. They keep it awake and moving.”
Now, I can hear you thinking, what about the scriptures that say, “If you believe and do not doubt…” Let's chat about that.
Ancient Hebrew culture was built on oral tradition. They didn’t write things down; they didn’t record events on their iPhones or Go-Pros. They relied on story telling to communicate their histories, politics, beliefs and values. Within this tradition, especially the Rabbinic Tradition, they used hyperbole as a way to get a point across; they exaggerated to over-communicate a thought, an idea, a value. Their exaggeration didn’t devalue the point they were trying to communicate; rather it indicated where people should pay close attention. They polarised ideas to lead people to think deeply into them. I think that’s what’s going on in Matt 21:21 when Jesus said, “Truly I tell you, if you have faith and do not doubt, not only can you do what was done to the fig tree, but also you can say to this mountain, ‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’ and it will be done.”
The phrase “rooter up of mountains” was a metaphor commonly used in Jewish literature of a great teacher or spiritual leader. In the Babylonian Talmud, the great rabbis are called “rooters up of mountains.” Such people could solve great problems and seemingly do the impossible.
We can approach doubts in a couple of different ways: we can let them be “the ants in the pants of [our] faith,” keeping us awake and alive, seeking truth and wonder, asking questions to gain wisdom. Then we can allow doubts to shut us down and fall asleep, become death-like to the miracles and wonder all around us.
Brian McLaren says, “There is a dark kind of doubt, exaggerated and self-destructive, that leads to despair, depression, and spiritual self-sabotage. I think of it like this: an imagination is good, but imagination out of control is called psychosis… Doubt is the same way. Out of control, it becomes unbelief, a hard heart, an arrogant or defeatist cynicism.”
I dare say that this same hardness can be found in a lot of “beliefs” we have a death grip on, too.
The key isn’t to NOT doubt, but rather to approach our doubts with a faith that says, “I need to lean in here, there is something beyond this.” Seek our doubts all the way through.
I hazard a guess that the only reason some of the ancient Rabbi’s could be called “rooters up of mountains” (which was to be called great problem solvers and ones who could seemingly do the impossible), was because their doubts and questions danced them into wisdom and truth, turning them into perpetual seekers and finders.
If you have faith – a faith that dances and moves, that is not ignorant of what is going on around you, that is not unfeeling to pain and suffering; a faith that leaps even when it doubts it can make it, and when it falls, lands onto grace that encourages you to try again – then even your deepest, darkest, scariest doubts will take you somewhere beautiful.
What do you doubt? Leave us a comment below.
Go to Part 3 – Questions and Answers »
[vcex_image_grid columns=”3″ pagination=”false” thumbnail_link=”custom_link” link_title_tag=”true” custom_links_target=”_blank” overlay_style=”title-category-visible” columns_gap=”5″ img_hover_style=”fade-out” image_ids=”20934,20935,20937″ custom_links=”https://itunes.apple.com/app/apple-store/id1239768002?pt=118656308&ct=blog%20footer&mt=8,https://www.pktfuel.com/dailyemail,https://www.pktfuel.com/support” img_height=”350″]